I Fucked Up

The Packers will miss the playoffs for the first time since 2008 and the blames falls squarely on me. This year I decided not to grow out my beard. I thought it was just a stupid superstition. Was I ever wrong.

I thought, “no one even cares about Samson. It’s so played out.” Then week six hits and 12 breaks his collarbone. If Samson’s around, there is no way that happens. Then we have so sit through a backup quarterback who looks like he glued pubes to his face and it’s no wonder our season’s in the shitter.

In fact, next year I’m going more extreme. Normally I only grow my beard during the season but since our last 6 drafts have sucked, I will grow it out in time for the draft. Samson will be back in 2018 to bring Vince home.

My sincerest apologies to Packers nation. I let you down.