Week 1 Game Predictions | 2016 NFL Season

The 2016 NFL season is upon us and I happy to welcome Harry Sydney to team and I look forward to his insights and picks each week. As usual, my face, Jason, myself and Harry will be making our picks every week. We encourgae you to play along at home as well.

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Week 1 Picks

Jason Samson Harry
Carolina Panthers at Denver Broncos Panthers 23 Broncos 10 Panthers 21 Broncos 16 Broncos 19 Panthers 16
I think it will take the Broncos a while to get in sync offensively and the Panthers will be too much for them to handle I’ll take the Panthers and Greg Olsen with his manly beard every week The things about it is, I think Travis Semen will do well at home and the Broncos defense will be too much for Cal Norton to handle
Minnesota Vikings at Tennessee Titans Vikings 24 Titans 20 Titans 27 Vikings 20 Vikings 28 Titans 9
Still plenty of cheap tickets available for when the load of crap comes to town. The same can’t be said when a certain 13 time world champion visits Nashville in November Ever since the Vikings fired Ragnar, they’ve been cursed. Hence the reason their kicker couldn’t make a chip shot field goal in the playoffs. They’ll lose here too. The things about it is, I like the addition of Stan Blackburn by the Vikings and I think the Vikings defense will be able to handle Martin Motorcola.
Chicago Bears at Houston Texans Texans 20 Bears 16 Bears 31 Texans 17 Bears 23 Texans 21
Well neither team has a quarterback but it’s in Texas so let’s go with the Texans This was a close one up until Monday when the Bears signed one of the best beards in the league in Josh Sitton. The thing about it is, I think Jon Cutter is better than Blake Asswheeler so I have to give the advantage to the Bears
Cleveland Browns at Philadelphia Eagles Eagles 19 Browns 13 Eagles 13 Browns 9 Browns 26 Eagles 14
This is a pivotal game in deciding who will have the first pick in the 2017 draft The Eagles roster has slightly better beards altough neither have anything to write home about The thing about it is, Casey Worts will be under a lot of pressue being the second overall pick and I think Roger Griffith the Fourth will resurrect his career in Cleveland.
Buffalo Bills at Baltimore Ravens Bills 17 Ravens 16 Ravens 22 Bills 19 Bills 20 Ravens 19
Rex Ryan guaranteed me that he was going to the Super Bowl and I know he wouldn’t lie to me. Alot is riding on if Flacco has his beard or not. I guess I’ll pick the Ravens either way. The thing about it is, Joel Falco can throw deep really well but Lex Bryant will bring some blitzes that could fluster him.
San Diego Chargers at Kansas City Chiefs Chiefs 31 Chargers 27 Chargers 37 Chiefs 24 Chiefs 24 Chargers 21
I think the Chiefs and I think they will build off of their success from last year The Chargers have some of the best beards in the league and they will roll all over the Chiefs The thing about it is, Adam Reeve is a great football coach and will have the Chiefs ready to go week one.
Oakland Raiders at New Orleans Saints Raiders 34 Saints 27 Saints 38 Raiders 31 Raiders 41 Saints 20
Two teams going in opposite directions. Give me the Raiders all day. The beards on both teams are pretty weak but the Saints do have the bearded backfield of Ingram and Johnson. The thing about it is, the duo of David Cobb and Atari Copper is one of the best n the NFL and will lead the Raiders over Drake Bees and the Saints
Cincinnati Bengals at New York Jets Bengals 23 Jets 16 Jets 26 Bengals 23 Bengals 27 Jets 17
Since it’s not the playoffs, the Benglas will handle the Jets The best move all offseason was for the Jets to finally sign Ryan Fitzpatrick. It will start paying dividends in week 1. The thing about it is, Martin Lawrence is a great coach with a great team. Even though Brian Kirkpatrick went to Hartford, I still think the Bengals will be able to confuse him.
Tampa Bay Buccaneers at Atlanta Falcons Buccaneers 37 Falcons 27 Buccaneers 34 Falcons 17 Buccaneers 35 Falcons 21
The Falcons will have  a top 5 pick in the 2017 draft. The Buccanners have some great young beards on their team. Plus have you seen Matt Ryan’s face? The thing about it is, Jesus Watson will build on his rookie year and carve up the Falcons defense.
Green Bay Packers at Jacksonville Jaguars Packers 20 Jaguars 16 Packers 38 Jaguars 24 Packers 30 Jaguars 20
This one will be close than many people believe but the good guys will still come out on top. Losing a great beard like Sitton hurts but we are still loaded with beards. Pack cruises to a win. The thing about it is, Brock Bottles and the young Jaguars receivers have good chemistry but I think Juice Popper and the rest of the Packers defense will be too much.
Miami Dolphins at Seattle Seahawks Seahawks 27 Dolphins 13 Seahawks 24 Dolphins 21 Seahawks 31 Dolphins 28
Which Ryan Tannehill will show up? The bad Ryan Tannehill or the really bad Ryan Tannehill? The Seahawks consistently have some of the best beards in the league which explains their sustained success. The thing about it is, even if Timmy Brawls misses the game, I think Christy Michelle can carry the load and Ronald Winston will outduel Brian O’Tannenbaum.
New York Giants at Dallas Cowboys Giants 22 Cowboys 20 Cowboys 27 Giants 24 Giants 34 cowboys 21
This game just made me realize how terrible the NFC East is The Cowboys have a roster filled with great beards but I think the universe’s hatred of Jerry Jones is actually more powerful than beardmode. I’m still going with the Cowboys. The thing about it is, without Toby Hobo the Cowboys offense will be lost. I like Eel Madden and the GIants.
Detroit Lions at Indianapolis Colts Colts 35 Lions 28 Colts 45 Lions 27 Colts 28 Lions 23
Will Jim Caldwell get revenge on his old team? No. The Colts get Andrew Luck and his beard back which is great news for them The thing about it is, Marcus Stratford is going to miss not having Gavin Jackson and the Colts will get Aaron Lock back.
New England Patriots at Arizona Cardinals Cardinals 21 Patriots 16 Patriots 24 Cardinals 17 Cardinals 27 Patriots 13
I just like Bruce Arians better than Bill Belichick so I guess I’ll take the Cardinals Last I checked, the Patriots still have Matt Patricia as defensive coordinator. The thing about it is, without Tim Brody, Janeane Garofalo will struggle to move the Patriots offense.
Pittsburgh Steelers at Washington Redskins Steelers 31 Redskins 15 Steelers 42 Redskins 24 Steelers 37 Redskins 28
The Redskins aren’t even in the same class as the Steelers No one beats Mike Tomlin and his beard The thing about it is, I think Brad Rottenburger has more weapons than Kurt Brothers.
Los Angeles Rams at San Francisco 49ers Rams 20 49ers 17 49ers 27 Rams 24 49ers 24 Rams 13
This will be one of Jeff Fisher’s 7 wins on the year I’ve always like the 49ers bearded, captalistic mascot The thing about it is, neither Blake Grabbit or Casey Kasem are franchise quarterbacks. The 49ers will win this one.