Now That Was a Terrible Win

I have good news and bad news and they’re both the same; that was an ugly win. I am actually very grateful to say that. The Packers just beat a team that they had lost to 3* times in a row, with the NFC Championship game loss being in excruciating fashion. The Packers won by double digits and yet, if felt like they didn’t play very well. That is a good problem to have.

The Offense

For the first three quarters of the game, the offensive strategy seemed solely based on their ability to get the Seahawks to jump offside. If they did, Rodgers threw it deep. If they didn’t, we were fucked. For the first three quarters the Packers offense looked absolutely terrified of the Seahawks and didn’t believe they could win. It wasn’t until they fell behind that someone had the great idea, “hey, we have the MVP… at home… where he hasn’t thrown an interception in over 2 years. Why don’t we let him throw the ball”? That idea was just crazy enough to work.

Speaking of Rodgers

We’re spoiled.  He had a quarterback rating of 116 and yet I thought he had an ‘ok’ game.

Stop the ‘Leg Shuffle-Point’

I fucking hate when a defensive player jumps across the line and the offensive lineman does the ‘leg shuffle-point’. It cost them five yards when Bakhtiari did it and more importantly it could cause a dead ball foul and take away a free play opportunity. And it looks stupid.

bakhtiari false start against seahawks

God’s Gift

We all know why Andrew Quarless is still on the team but after two weeks, he has many catches as I do and doesn’t have an awesome beard to fall back  on. Actually God’s Gift has only been slightly less productive than Jimmy Graham… So he’s got that going for him. Maybe we can trade him for a first and starting offensive lineman.

Don Makjkowski

The Majik Man still knows when it’s a TD


The Defense

Just as in the aforementioned NFC Championship game, the defense had a solid first half only to get walked all over in the 3rd quarter. I go back and forth on whether they have a good scheme and terrible players or good players and a terrible scheme. It’s probably a combination of both but more so for the latter. With the exception of a few bad players (one highlighted below) I believe the players outplayed Dom’s shitty defense.

Nate Palmer

I mentioned last week how he took over for A.J. Hawk in making tackles 6 yards down field but he also took over for Erik Walden by getting juked out of his shorts by a quarterback. Apparently Russell Wilson looks like Barry Sanders to him.

russell wilson jukes nate palmer


A certain beard called his shot before the game saying that with the return of Datone Jones, Marshawn Lynch would be lucky to get 50 yards. What did he end up with? 41 yards.

Jayrone Elliott

jayrone elliott

Special Teams

Good tackling. No blunders. No kicks blocked. HALLELUJAH! Looks like giving special teams coach Ron Zook a beard worked!


Even though it was the number one officiating crew, there were alot of flags last night. Pete Carroll bitched as normal at calls that don’t go his way. He thinks they got robbed on the 12 men on the field penalty in the first and the fumble recovery in the 4th. I have already outlined how I think they should be flagged for 12 men on the field for every play of their home games. Also, after the Fail Mary, Pete Carroll should be banned from arguing a call ever again.

Saints – Seahawks Trade

As mentioned above, the Saints and Seahawks made a blockbuster trade this past spring with the Seahawks sending starting center Max Unger and a first round pick to the Saints for tight end Jimmy Graham. Both teams are a combined 0-4. That’s what you call a lose-lose trade.

God Loves…

raised the question before the game of which team God loved more and got a resounding answer yesterday that it is indeed the Packers. Also, Aaron Rodgers apparently thinks Russell Wilson is as big of a douchebag as I do.


It looked like it may be the bodybag game part two. The Packers lost Eddie Lacy, Davante Adams and Josh Boyd, early. Luckily the Packers escaped with only minor injuries to Lacy and Adams. The same can’t be said for Boyd. I think this Tweet said it best.

*Technically only twice in a row as the Fail Mary game was ACTUALLY won by the Packers.

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